Tag Archives: Byers road

Making grown men cry…

18 Nov

So, obviously it’s only been a little while since I last wrote but a combination of my desire to whinge about stuff, how bad the last post was and being guilt tripped by my friend about not posting often enough, I thought I’d shock everyone to their foundations and get a post out, not only on time, but early!

Okay, I’m sure you’re probably desperate to hear more of the riveting life I’ve been leading… Well, I’ve spent the last few days relaxing, or as my lovely new friend calls ‘Zenning out’. It may be obvious to you that he is a Buddhist, and he replied to a message I wrote on twitter about learning meditation. He’s given me some pretty useful advice so if anyone wants me to put it on her, just leave a comment and I’ll do so!

Anyway, yes, I’ve spent quite a lot of time the last few days attempting to meditate, something I’ve never tried before. Safe to say it was a bit of a nightmare. For those of you who have ever attempted meditation, you’ll probably have experienced the same ‘mind buzz’ that’s plagued me. My brain just won’t shut up! I’m trying to follow the advice I’ve been given though, which includes attempting to ‘unburden my mind’, so here I am doing just that.

Okay, there were a few things I wanted to fit into the last post but, as is my wont, I rambled on for too long to actually say anything I wanted to.

Well, one thing which I had planned to moan about was my misfortune at bumping into a religious campaigner, intent to convert me to some rather obscure branch of a religion. (I’ll refrain from mentioning which religion, in case someone takes offence and think I’m implying that all the folk of this, while obscure, still quite interesting sect are as nutty as this muppet). This man pulled me aside while I was hurriedly rushing down Byers road, laden with four bags of heavy shopping, soaked through from the torrential downpour which had barely calmed down. Apparently thinking that this would be an excellent time to have a theological chitchat, he persistently stepped in front of me, smiling and asking if I truly wished to burn in hell for the rest of eternity. Apparently, answering that at least it’d be warmer than Glasgow was not what he had hoped to hear. As I attempted to side-step him and avoid the argument I knew was about to ensue, he then decided to tell me God would hate me for my sins and for not listening to him, who was God’s holy messenger. Now this I could not pass up.

I think it’s fair to say that, after this comment, I was justified in ‘discussing’ this with the half-witted eejit. So, he proceeded to ‘debate’ God, religion, heaven, hell, wrath, atonement and how ‘God loves you, but if you don’t do what I tell you, he’ll send you to hell and let Hitler, Sudam Hussein, Mohammed and Buddha rape, abuse and mutilate you’.

After this last comment I admit I did actually have to pause and wonder if he really just classed Buddha and Muhammed with Hitler and Hussein. By this point in the conversation I’d pretty much anticipated complete and utter nonsense to come spewing out of the man’s mouth, however this astounded me.

I interrupted him for the first time during out conversation and asked him to explain why the Buddha and Muhammed would do that. His answer?

“The Bible tells us that worshipping other Gods means that God hates you, so yes, eve n the ‘perfect’ (here he felt it necessary to emphasis his disgust by ‘air-quoting’) Buddha would go to hell.”

And why would he be abusing me? Because he’s a man and God made men better than women so even in hell they have the right to do whatever they like to women because women are subordinate and naturally sinful, like Eve. The only way to save yourself was to embrace Jesus, accept you’re naturally sinful if you’re female and donate a whole lot of money to his campaign.

And this is where I thought I should enlighten him (no pun intended) on a few things.

I started by pointing out that Judaism, Christianity and Islam are all Abrahamic faiths, and all derive from the same God. Then Pointing out that Buddhists do not believe in ANY God. Then pointing out that men did far more sinning in the Bible than women. Then pointing out a few reasons why every argument he’d said contradicted itself, taking him by complete surprise by quoting passages of the Bible (more accurately than he did).

When I then went on to politely inform him that attempting to convert someone to a religion, when they know bugger all about it is never a good idea. And it’s an even worse idea to do so on Byers road, where the majority of folks are students that are as equally likely to go through him like a dose of salts for attempting to. By the time I was finished ‘explaining’ why I would not convert to his religion, he burst into tears, stamped his foot on the ground drama-queen style and told me I was the devil incarnate, come to create havoc on earth. I decided my day had significantly improved.

Moving on, some nice stuff has happened too! I’ve spent a lot of time catching up with some old friends and teachers this week. I met a good friend of mine at the English Literature society and we had a blast trading gossip on all our old friends. This weekend I’m meeting up with some friends as well, going for a few (possibly significantly more than a few) drinks as well.

I’ve also been working on sonnets this week. I’ve written one which I was very glad to just finish, but reading it over, I’ve decided it needs some serious reworking. I’ve also got a few ideas for short stories milling about, I’m just trying to get them off the ground. I’ve been getting a bit of feedback on some ideas too, so hopefully I’ll kick this bloody writers’ block and get some things written!

Anyway, again, I’ve gone off track and said bugger all. I’ll behave next time I promise! I’ll post soon! Bye!

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